Reflection for the new year

I am an introvert.  I am a nerd.  I am also very smart.  I am beautiful.  I am talented in many things, and I’m generally lazy.  But obsessive compulsive.

Smart and beautiful, you would think I could have the world.

The expectation that I was going to grow up and be a doctor or do something amazing.  Everything I tried I should instantly be the best – ballet, music, math, science.

But what if I wasn’t?  What if I was?  How can I be a ballerina if I’m supposed to be a doctor?  I should quit rather than fail.  Not try to start than fail.

What if I like math and science, but don’t want to treat patients?  What if I don’t actually know what I like versus what I’m told to like?